agoldenslumbers:

Tune Ups/Voicemails- Hey, we’re Mark and Roger, we live alone and we’re supposed to be evicted. We also seem to hate people.

RENT- What the fuck do you do without money? Burn shit and complain. Sounds good.

You Okay Honey?- ”Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I have AIDS! Come to life support maybe?”

One Song Glory- Roger, “So I’m still not dead from this shit? What the fuck?”

Light My Candle- Mimi, “Let’s fuck” Roger, “You look like my dead girlfriend” Mimi, “maybe some other time.”

Today For You- Angel, “I’m a drag queen and got paid to kill a dog by playing drums. I’ll let you decide if that means I’m good or bad at it. I still have AIDS and me and Collins are dating and we met each other a few minutes ago. Deal with it bitches I’m fabulous.”

You’ll See- Fuck you Benny

Tango Maureen- Maureen is a two-timing ho’. Let’s dance about it.

Life Support- Mark you are one awkward fuck. By the way we’re dying. Hey!

Out Tonight- Mimi, “I’m a stripper, still don’t wanna fuck?”

Another Day- Roger “I want to but I don’t want to give you AIDS” Mimi, “Live for today bitch!” Neither one actually mentions the fact they have AIDS so it’s like nothing happened except a lot of feelings.

Will I- The show will continue in a second. Be right back. Cast is singing about their feelings.

Santa Fe- I have a dream!

I’ll Cover You- We’ve barely know each other for a day but we’re dating YAY!

We’re Okay- Joanne’s a busy butch.

Christmas Bells- Everything is happeni-SNOOOOOOOOW!

Over The Moon- Moo bitches!

La Vie Boheme A- Fuck you Benny! We’re fucking awesome!

I Should Tell You- You have AIDS too? Small world! Let’s fuck.

La Vie Boheme B- We’re really fucking awesome! Everyone’s just so jealous of our homelessness!

Seasons of Love- EVERYBODY IS GOING TO DIE!…someday

Happy New Year- Breaking and entering, and Angel has a new wig. Fuck you Benny.

Take Me or Leave Me- Way too much rubber and estrogen.

Without You- I’m really a fucking mess, and very needy.

Contact- sexsexsexsexsexsex Angel Dies sexsexsexsex bad sex.

I’ll Cover You Reprise- ALL THE FEELS!

Halloween- Hey Mark let’s review the show shall we!

Goodbye Love- Hey I’m dying and you’re leaving. Cool. See ya bitch.

What You Own- Mark, “Fuck you producers I finally have friends!” Roger, “I have feelings? Just kidding guys I’m not leaving!”

Voice Mail #5- Just a bunch of needy parents.

Finale- Hey it’s where we started the show! I guess it’s ending-Mimi’s dying! Surprise! Not really.

Your Eyes- Hey don’t die yet I have to sing for you!

Finale B- NoDayButTodayNoDayButTodayNoDayButTodayNoDayButTodayNoDayButTodayNoDayButTodayNoDayButTodayNoDayButToday FEELINGS!